I saw her today.
To be more precise, I saw her about an hour ago.
At at supermarket where I was about to buy some daily things for myself.
At the main door, before I went into it.
She smiled to me.
And I realized that was a smile which I have been longing after for so long time.
A smile that make me smile back from the bottom of my heart in the past.
And yet I was such a jerk that dont even know how to react.
I just walked by and keep on stealing the sight of her.
Am I really such a idiot ?
I just never thought that I would see her again.
In the building, I thought I was very sure of myself of what I want to buy but in the end, I left without purchasing a single thing.
My heart was jumping so fast and my mind was just a blank.
To be honest, I almost cried out, but I hold myself down and show no weakness in front of everyone.
I just found that....I really miss her a lot.
I hate myself for this but I was happy to be able to see her again.
I took a long route back home.
Everything about my life poped out in my mind.
I know, after so long time, I am just paralyzing myself in things I do everyday.
Online games, comics, Starbucks, ....
I was putting up a mask to show everyone that I was laughing outside.
In fact, tears are still flowing in the inside.
You just cant make a scar go away, dont you? Lol...
Almost every night before I close my eyes to sleep, I am thinking about, what should I do if I see her again.
Just never expect I really would see her again.
It's true, I am really really happy to see her.
If there is a chance, I really wanna see her again.
But I know not the opposite side.
At least, I know that's the thing I could do to not appear in front of her anymore.
I just cant deny that....
I still miss her ...so so much!!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
man the fuck up and go talk to her.. well at least just a hi would do.. u have nothing to lose rite ? its not that shes gonna shout at you and ask u to back off.. u never know she might want you back, if u keep avoiding her..HAHA :p
walau, how you found out my blogsite de?hahaha~
Thanks for the advice, man! but, you know, I am kinda coward out everytime I see her~ lol
i know.... :-) well, u being cowardly is probably the biggest turnoff for her.. just straighten up and go up to her confidently.. act like nothing is happening.. say hi and ask her how shes been doing lately and tell her that its nice to see her again.. and that'll probably make her day and who knows shell start falling for u again for ur manliness and maturity..running away is just gonna make her feel that ur a sorry ass coward who needs to grow up and be a man :-) best of luck bud!
if u like a girl that much.. theres always a reason to show all ur positive side.. character is what makes a man :-)
Post a Comment