When the cold and hot combined

I typed and I deleted it.
I typed it again and I deleted it again.
I know I have something to say.
I know I have something to ask.
I know I have something to write it here.
And I wonder how am I going to "re-decorate" it and "wrap" it nicely before presenting it.
I just don't want to create any trouble, any misunderstanding, especially not causing any sadness.

As I know, hurricane is formed by the combination of hot and cold air.
Hurricane messed up and destroyed anything wherever it goes and passed through.
And for human's feeling, the combination of hot and cold, it brings confusion.
Confusion messed up one's heart, making your day from worse to worst, brings you one of the worst feeling you ever had in life and you couldnt decide what's the next step or action you should take.
Scare of making the wrong decision, you will lost the thing you want forever.

Yesterday, I lied my head down onto the table, looking blankly at the wall.
I was not clearly knowing what's on my mind, what song am I listening to.
All I know, I was pretty down on that time.

I reach out one of my hand..
Trying to catch the light which forced itself in from the outside.
When everyone knows it's impossible to do so and so do I.

But somehow, I get to know that, there is no impossible as long as you try hard enough and never give up.
I guess there is some of the things that you just couldnt reach and get no matter how much effort you've put into it.
And by that time, give up could be the best choice you've got to make.

However, when the confusion sets in...
You will never know what will be the next step that you should take.
There will be too much "if" occur in my mind ..
Is that a sign ? Or..
Is this just a bump on the pathway? Or..
Is it the time to give up?
If ya, how ??
You just couldnt decide.